More on the Potty Training Saga
Jaimie on Feb 18th 2008
So, I am kind of at a loss.
I have a 3 1/2 year old who steadfastly refuses to use the toilet. If he’s naked, he pees on the floor. If he has underwear on, he pees in his pants. He doesn’t even seem to notice until after the fact, and he has no discernible “pee pee dance” that I can fathom. He just… pees.
Things that are not pee, I at least have some warning of. There are behavior cues I can pick up on. Consequently, we have had more success with that.
But pee - never. Not ONCE has he peed on the toilet. Or his little small potty. Or anywhere one is supposed to pee, except diapers. He has peed on my couch. And the rug. And in so many pairs of underwear I stopped counting. But never in an appropriate place. We’ve tried having him read a social story about how he is a big boy and needs to use the toilet. That made him sit on it more willingly, but didn’t cause any peeing to happen. We’ve got books on Elmo using the potty. He thinks they are funny, but they don’t help. We’ve tried stickers, we’ve tried timers, I am at the verge of offering lollipops. I guess I could duct tape the small potty to him…
Okay, I won’t do that. Until he is at least 4. 
Eventually. I think, at least. Maybe I can find a potty training boot camp to send him to.
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You are doing fine. He’s just not ready yet. It could be worse. I have a six year old who would prefer to wear diapers or pullups than to use the toilet. _Unless_ he’s at school or daycare. If we make him wear underwear at home, he pees on the couch, the rug, his bed, my bed, my husband, my lap. If we don’t notice when he’s peeing and ask him if his pants are wet, he’d deny it until the cows come home. We tried letting him wear wet pants until he asked to be changed and he just waits until his pants have dried again.
Things that are not pee, he holds until just before bedtime, after we’ve put him in a pullup, after we’ve had him sit on his potty while we read to him for twenty minutes, after everything else.
If he’s at school or day care, his control is no better, but he will go and get new clothes from his bag and change himself in the washroom without prompting.
It’s frustrating beyond belief.
According to our doctor, he should be able to go 2 hours between voidings. We get him to try every thirty minutes and he still manages to wet the entire house on a regular basis(5 or 6 times a day). Our doctor says it’s important to let him have as much water as he wants. There is nothing physically/medically wrong, and in all other aspects, he’s a bright kid.
If you find a potty training boot camp, let me know. I’d move there tomorrow.
Ugh, I’ve got one of those, too. Once I finished the first two kids potty training, I was pretty sure that I was the most excellent potty-trainer ever. Until the third one came around and I potty trained him for two years.
I did the same as Yukonruby - let him stay wet, but he did the same as her kiddo, just waited until it dried again.
We bribed with EVERYTHING. We tried and tried every trick in the book. He just was too lazy to get up and go. Would rather sit in his own pee and smell like a truck stop bathroom. I also discovered that he goes about four times in a one-hour period then he can go for about four hours without going - weird, but once I figured it out, it was far less frustrating.
Finally, he’s five, and he *mostly* goes on his own. Sorry for the lack of encouragement, though. Potty training is worse than a stomach virus, because it just goes on and on and on. I hate it.