Hug Twice

I was sitting at my computer catching up on a few things while my daughter was sleeping and my son was playing with his trains in the next room.  Or so I thought.

Until he strolled by in a pair of my heels.  And then kept going into the kitchen - click clack click clack.

I actually think he walks in them better than I do.

CJ has always loved to dress up, and we keep old halloween costumes around just for that purpose.  He also has been fascinated with my taekwondo shoes for a long time, but I thougt that was because they are pretty simple to put on and not too hard for him to walk in, even with the difference in our foot sizes.  But I guess he’s skilled at walking in any of my shoes.

I’m not sure how to break the news to his father…

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Honestly, I thought my son was a climber until I had my daughter.  I swear I will go to the bathroom some day and come back to find her on top of the refrigerator.

Okay, no I won’t.  Ever since my pee break gave her enough time to get onto the dining room table I’ve made her come to the bathroom with me.

I think the first words Alexa actually learned to understand and respond to were “Alexa get down!”.  And she’s sly about it.  She’ll start to get down, and then she’ll look around to see if we are still paying attention, and if she thinks we aren’t she’ll climb back up onto whatever it is.

Other than weighting her down with some ankle weights I have no idea how to keep her on the ground.  And no, I haven’t used ankle weights… yet.

It is only a matter of time until she figures out how to get out of her crib.  And then we’re all in trouble.

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Unsurprisingly, I frequently find myself unconsciously putting my own needs last on the list.  Unsurprising because I am a mom, and somehow that seems to come with the mom territory.  But honestly, I’m not that unselfish of a person, I think, so I find it really odd that I’ll go two days without getting a chance to shower or trim my toenails or whatever.

I don’t smell, I promise.  I do get to jump in the shower to at least hose off.  Heh.  But I was thinking about this especially today when I was washing my hands in the bathroom and realized my lip hair had grown back without me even noticing.  And my eyebrows looked like they hadn’t been plucked in about a year.  Did I mention I had my first haircut in three years a few weeks ago?  When did I stop caring about how I looked?  I think it is time for me to give up the hope thet “What Not To Wear” is going to find me and figure out how to pull myself together.

I don’t know when or how this happened, but as the kids get older and their pressing needs aren’t always so immediate, I’ve found myself slowly reclaiming a little of my own time.  Not a whole lot, but sometimes when they are in the sunroom playing, I’ll sit with them with my book instead of playing with them the entire time.  Or I’ll ask Matt to play with the kids not because I have to do something else, but just so I can sit for ten minutes and relax.

I don’t know how we get mommy guilt, but typing the idea that I sometimes read while my kids are happily independently playing gave me a twinge of guilt, like I am admitting a crime of some sort.  Which of course I am not, and I don’t feel guilty about it.  But I guess I think I should feel guilty.

And I even shower most days now.  Sometimes I even take a bath. :)  Next on the list, actually start caring about my appearance again.  Maybe.

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Most of my life, I have had long hair.  As a child, it was my mother’s preference, and then as an adult, it has been general laziness.  When I was a child, I had a bad habit of chewing on my hair, and when I finally broke that habit, it got replaced with twirling my hair around my index finger, a habit I still have today.

However, contrary to what one might think, when my hair is really long, I do the hair twirling less and less.  Basically because I have my hair back in a ponytail and so it isn’t right there and easily accessible.  But two weeks ago I got my haircut to shoulder length, and ever since, the hair twirling habit has been back in full force.

I didn’t even realize it at first, but I twirl my hair all the time.  When I’m bored, when I’m nervous, when I’m thinking… whenever.  Twirl, twirl, twirl.  I bet I look rather silly.

Eventually my hair will grow back and the temptation to twirl will be gone.  until then…  twirl.

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After peeing on the potty after her bath three nights ago, Alexa did the same the next night, and then in the morning the next day after nursing, she peed on the potty again.  She’s not potty trained, or anywhere near that, but she’s happy to sit on the potty and once in a while, she pees.  It’s more progress than I’ve made in more than 2 years of effort with my son, so I will definitely take what I can get!

I’ve been trying to encourage CJ to follow suit, especially yesterday when he witnessed Alexa pee on the small portable potty in the morning.  He asks to sit on the potty after Alexa, sits for about 3 seconds, then runs away telling me “Good job!”.  When I called my mother today to talk to her, I told her about Alexa peeing on the potty, and then CJ had this conversation with my mother (I only heard the part he said) :

CJ:  Yes, pee on the potty!  I love the potty.

CJ:  Alexa pee on the potty.  Alexa.

CJ:  No Nana, only Alexa pee on the potty.  Just Alexa.

CJ:  I can’t want to pee on the potty.  I can’t want to!

At this point he handed me back the phone.  ;)  He substitutes “can’t” for “don’t” or “won’t” all the time.  My mom said she just asked him about the potty, and then if he peed on it.  Apparently, not.

Peer pressure has nothing on him. 

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